my year, my year, will finally disappear

hi, how are you? sometimes i stray. i started this blog as a sort of musical diary, as a way to sort out, musically, all that was going on in my life. but i get distracted...i put up videos...so, i guess i haven't strayed. that's how my mind works. every blog i've posted this year has meant something very specific to me. you won't ever really understand but when i look back on it i know what triggered each entry.

the year has been difficult. my best friend lost a child. my marriage ended. other things...smaller things...

and this may sound trite: i would not have made it through this year without music. i wouldn't have had an outlet. or a reference point. or a friend.

for example, i'm listening to 'blood on the tracks' right now. and every song speaks to me. the loss, the sadness, the struggle to accept it all. the deep sadness in dylans' voice singing 'you're a big girl now'.

or 'magic and loss' by lou reed. a brilliant album dealing with death. head on. 'you loved a life others throw away nightly, it's not fair, not fair at all'. i used to think of my dad when i heard that song. now i think of a 6 month old and his father. and how could i even deal with that without this song?

god only knows. 'god only knows'. that's my favorite song. i danced to it on my wedding day. it put into words and music how i felt about the woman i loved. i haven't listened to it since my marriage ended. but i will again someday. and it will always be my favorite song.

and i listened to 'game of pricks' by gbv this afternoon. 'can't call you or on you no more/when they're attacking me'. 'i'll climb up on the house/weep to water the trees'. i thought of my home. the one i visit bi-weekly, and i felt so sad. but i also felt comforted. like my friend had an arm around me, kissing me on the top of my head saying 'it'll be ok, i promise'.

and i listened to 'peep hole'. and the line 'i'm looking inside your brain/and christ it's a cluttered mess/i love you i must confess'. and i know...

now 'idiot wind' is playing and my bullshit machismo is rising up. fuck it.

and the kinks played. and springsteeen. and costello and the replacements. and scott walker and joy division and the talking heads and eno and robert wyatt and elliott smith and jay bennett and black flag and wussy and wilco and nina simone and flaming lips and mercury rev and...and...hundreds of others.

and what would i have done without them?

and my brother got married this year. that was wonderful.

and tom petty played.

and i gained a fantastic sister-in-law. a sister.

and the beach boys played at their wedding.

'don't worry baby, everything will turn out allright'.

and the kiss on my forehead.

thank you, thank you.

Kinks - How Do I Get Close

does anyone else remember this song? it's really, really great. think it was on 'uk jive'? terrible video, but really, listen to it. beautiful.

petty on shandling

i totally remember seeing this when it aired. i actually think of it often. yeah...anyway, loved the show, love the song!

Tonight The Bottle Let Me Down - Elvis Costello

his version of a great merle haggard song. i love a good drinking song! almost as much as i love a good drink! and yea, that's nick lowe on bass and john hiatt on guitar and backing vox. 'almost blue', which this song is on, has become one of my fave costello albums.

Lou Barlow Brand New Love(live)

such a fantastic song. vicious and gentle and ugly and sweet. when he says 'anyone can be a brand new love', he means it as a threat, or a warning, right? please, correct me if i'm wrong.

RUNAWAY - Del Shannon

i've been listening to a shitload of dell shannon latley. he killed himself, y'know. he's just so good. such an amazing voice. great surfy guitar. and that keyboard! there's no one like him. you know, people of my generation were raised thinking the beatles were the shit. they were good, sure. but i'd put on 'hats off to del shannon' way before i'd put on sgt. pepper. in fact i'd like to be put on record as saying 'sgt.pepper' is a piece of shit. except for 'day in the life'. but really, is there a 'i just wansn't made for these times' on that album? no, there's not. fuck the beatles.

1 of 5 reasons to like christmas:#5

a perfect song.

1 of 5 reasons to like christmas:#4

1 of 5 reasons to like christmas:#3

this song sums up everything i feel about christmas! ha!

1 of 5 reasons to like christmas:no 2

one of my favorite melodies of all time.

1 of 5 reasons to like christmas

i hate christmas. fucking hate it. but i love xmas music. so the top 5 begins today. enjoy.

-aholic

i buy alot of records. lots, lots, lots! these are the 5 i got this week:

1.the minus 5-down with wilco

2.betty davis-betty davis

3.the only ones-best of

4.big youth-screaming target

5.del shannon-20 greatest hits

i'm not gonna explain them. but if you want to buy any one of them you will not be disappointed. right now i'm playing del shannon. that voice! ooohhhhh!!!!

Buena Vista Social Club - Chan Chan

know what's great and exciting about music? you'll never hear it all.

song of the week

once a week (maybe, i may lose interest next week) i'll declare a 'song of the week'. i'll print the lyrics, recommend that you download it (ugh), and discuss what i like about it.

this weeks song is 'dear employer (the reason i quit) by the minus 5. the minus 5 is Scott McCaughey's (of young fresh fellows and rem) band with various sidekicks. this one is with wilco and peter buck.

couple of reasons i picked this. first, always, is the fantastic melody. sung over and over in a pretty consistent laid back way. wilco shines on the track. similar in buildup to 'via chicago' there is a simple chord structure embellished by electronic gurgles, an erratic mix, drums that almost serve as a double lyric. they rush when necessary, silence when needed.

a two week notice, the song is. some guy quitting a shit job. he mentions escalators. he's like me. at a job you do and don't think about. he's moving on to something better. than the class element enters into it. 'you commanded me'. 'when you were knee high, higher than i'. i love the impersonality of it. 'dear employer', 'sir', 'mr. smith', it's all the same. you do it to somebody too, and you spent a lot more money to do it.

than it gets personal. 'cuz i'm a lost cause, causing a problem', 'i'll be long gone, long gone and rotting, long gone and ulcerous, nothing untold'. suddenly it's a suicide note. is the employer a boss or family. is there a difference?

and the music swirls. 'that's the reason that i quit'.

a beautiful song.

Dear employer I'd like to tell you It's been wonderful for all these years

But now you know I've got a new shoe And I'll be wearing it so far from here
Dear employer your escalators Are very dangerous on the way down

They rip the skin and they pull you in Spit out the boney bits and coffee grounds
Dear employer I heard a story When you were just knee-high higher than I

You built the wings and the propeller too

With balsa wood and glue you made it fly
Dear employer you commanded me Your commendations now don't mean as much

Cause I'm a lost cause causing a problem

And I promise to be way out of touch
Dear employer when you hear the news Please save the saintly words for saintly souls

Cause I'll be long gone long gone and rotting

Long gone and ulcerous nothing untold
That's the reason that I quit The reason that I quit That's the reason that I quit

The reason that I quit That's the reason that I quit The reason that I quit

That's the reason

That's the reason
That's the reason

that's the reason

Del Shannon - Hats Off To Larry

del shannon was the shit. great song, great sound, great voice. and this is from the '80's! what was he doing in that awful decade?

studio rehearsals - Burnin and lootin - Bob Marley

you're probably not gonna see this one in a commercial. THIS is punk.

The Only Ones - Another Girl Another Planet Music Video

this is one of my favorite songs. not that it's any of your fucking business.

The Passenger - Iggy Pop

what can i say about iggy? he was cooler than anyone in the '70's and, well, can you name someone cooler than him now?

Stephen Stills Manassas - It Doesn't Matter

great song off of a superb album. he has such a great voice. and that guitar is so fucking cool.

The Silver Jews (1 of 5)- How to Rent a Room

xoxo

ROBERT WYATT FREE WILL AND TESTAMENT

when was the last time you heard a robert wyatt song on the radio? let me anser that for you: you've never heard a robert wyatt song on the radio. a true artist, philosopher, and intellectual. so i guess that's three strikes against him.
the last minute of this clip is glorious.

something i learned today

you know what' great? sitting and listening to music. have you done it lately? i mean just sit there and listen. don't have it on while you clean the house. don't have it playing in the other room. just sit there (or preferably lay) and listen.

today i listened to robert wyatt's new one 'comicopera'.

then i had on the first manassas album. hate csn, love manassas!

then i put on the martin hannett collection that big beat put out. you know martin hannett right? yea, he's great.

i had on nick cave's 'no more shall we part' on for a while, but it wasn't exactly what i wanted. it's a fine album tho' and if you don't know it, well, i'm sure you have your good points too.

and i lay there. and relaxed. and let it all wash over me.

now, some people may have said i wasted my day. some people may have been out with their pals today, maybe watching the football game. do they play football on sat.? if you know the answer to that get off this page. i hate you and you're not welcome back. some people may have spent the day getting some work done around the house. i can't blame you. the place is a fucking mess!

me? i just lay there. like a slob. unshaved and in my pajamas. just absorbing the music. listening to every bit of it. the oddball percussion on the manassas album. the quiet beauty of robert wyatt. the outerspace pop of martin hannett. i lay there and took it all in.

and i feel like i got alot done. i feel like i'm better than when i woke up. when i'm at work tomorrow i will close my eyes when the headache hits, i will think of a record spinning 33 and 1/3revolutions per minute and i will be ok. i will be ok.

Jeff Tweedy-theologians

great version of one of my fave wilco songs. 'a ghost is born'. how can you argue with a line like that?

The Yardbirds - Train Kept a Rollin' (live 1966)

one of the great riffs of all time. so tough sounding.

To love somebody Nina Simone

i heard this version of the great bee gees song for the first time the other day. i may like it better than the flying burrito brothers version.

for these last few days leave me alone

i think i would have like new order alot more if this is the direction they had continued in after ian curtis died. i mean, i like them and all, but, this and ceremony are by far their best songs.

Nick Lowe - Without Love

nick lowe is a genius songwriter and doesn't get nearly enough respect.

well said pt. 5

I have my own particular sorrows, loves, delights; and you have yours. But sorrow, gladness, yearning, hope, love, belong to all of us, in all times and in all places. Music is the only means whereby we feel these emotions in their universality. ~H.A. Overstreet