ramones- loudmouth

'we're the ramones. and you're a loudmouth, baby. you better shut it up'- ramones.



there has never been a better band. i could go on, but... i mean...watch this. tell me. who's better? fuck you. no, they're not. go the fuck back to sleep.

there is a ship- peter, paul, and mary

r.i.p.

a fool will waste his life, god rest his guts

ed. note: please listen while you read. it works better that way.


you could go in the front way or the back way. if you were lucky you got in the back way. it was dark, and there was a piano right by the stairs that led to the bar. i seranaded many a lady on that piano, tho ther was only a real lady there once. and i never bedded her. but i love her still. true story. 2nd girl i ever kissed and still the best. front porch of kathy's house, i believe. i remember these things. they are important. it was a magical kiss, cuz it was a long time coming. it was mostly cuz of exclusion, true. but aren't most kisses? aren't you with the person your'e with cuz they're the last option? they were the best of the worst? jeez, listen to me. i'm so jaded. am i old enough to be so jaded? fuck, yes, i am.

but the back door. you had to knock. cuz, y'know, this was before the age of cell phones. so, no, not knock. pound! and usually there was somebody upstairs smoking. or trying to get a private moment with a....well...y'know...special for the moment person. so, you'd pound, hopefully for a minute and they'd open the door and it would swing open and your already half drunk night would begin for real!! because you had full run of the keg! and there were no adults! cuz you were adults. legally. for real. tho' not old enough to drink. hee hee hee.

i broke my hand there once. punched the big fucking oak door. rightfully so. cuz of a girl named erin. funny. i have a sister in law named erin. but she wasn't even the girl i was in love with!! it was ****. 'sweet lou', as she was known. and, let it be known, i have loved other girls since. slept with some. married one. but have i ever felt anything so intensely? probly not. but i was young. so young. and so drunk.

i have loved alchohol for many years. in many ways it has been my most succesful relationship. i keep going back to it. it never judges. never regects. it always welcomes me back after i have strayed.

and yet...

and yet...

our relationship is frowned upon.

so i abstain.

for small periods of time.

but you should know, honey. and you should know, friends. that i'm coming back for you. cuz you're the one for me, baby.

and none of these motherfuckers can ever convince me of anything else.

shane macgowan- that woman's got me drinking

bob dylan-idiot wind

beck- guess i'm doing fine

life is great except for the thinking and feeling.

jim carroll

r.i.p.

edie brickell and the new bohemians- circle

i have always loved this song. 'i quit, i give up, nothings good enough for anybody else'. that goes through my head every day! and then! 'being alone is the best way to be'. perfect! no wonder paul simon loves her!

'wild man' fischer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i know, i know, things have been sorta, uh, grim on the site lately. sorry. and sorry for the misogynistic crap. i often lead with the tongue and not with the brain. here's something fun!
'wild man' fischer! sure, some of you may laugh. or turn away in disgust. but he worked with frank zappa. what have you ever done?

sebadoh- rebound

'i'm no one you can trust
all little boy lonely
and curious lust.'

leave me alone- new order

the sun is out today. my head is far above it. the sun orbits my head. a single black car circles the block. it slows at my doorway. I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT! it will not happen today. the sun will shine. my eyes will open. i am sure of this. i have never doubted my immortality. the world would end without me. you cease to exist when my thoughts of you fade. this power i have is crushing. it weighs on me. it is a responsibility i cannot bear for much longer. you, my puppets, are an albatross. you suck the life out of me. but if your strings are cut, what of my arms? they will gesticulate wildly! they will lash out in anger! they will do the unspeakable!! so instead, i will tie your strings tighter around my fingers. til the tips turn blue. and i, you, we, will sleep. for a thousand hours.

well said, etc.

'get me out of here
get me out of here
i hate it here
get me out of here'-alex chilton

twilight singers- 40 dollars

i've been listening to dulli (the afghan whigs, the twilight singers) for years. he is one of my few heroes. a brilliant musician, infusing soul with hard rock better than anyone else. listen to the whigs version of 'band of gold' if you're not convinced.
but what i really have always liked...
and i'm ashamed to admit it...
is his attitude towards women. as objects. things to be used. things not to be trusted. i have never felt this way towards women.
but i'm turning over a new leaf.
i know, i know. that's a bad attitude. but still....shouldn't i? what's the point of feeling anything? shouldn't i just want to get laid? isn't that all they're good for?
but maybe i shouldn't generalize. i mean, are we men that much better? i mean, sure, i, as a person, am better. but i can't expect you, you horrid creatures, to live up to me. i, for sure, am a genius. and i have great things waiting for me! fuck it. 'i'm just being honest'. as the man says. suck it if you don't like it, you silly people. love don't mean a thing, except 2 a.m and a telephone ring.

elvis costello- i want to vanish

i was gonna write some ill advised misogynistic rant (involving my theory that women prefer being treated like semen banks and punching bags ( i will return to this theory )) but i'm just too tired. and i just don't care anymore. i've lost my fight, it seems. i just want to close my eyes for a while. i want to go where there is music, music in the air, and it comes from nowhere, it is faceless, and i am not reminded of everything i have lost. i just want my rest.

alone again, naturally

alone again! what do i call this? a 'breakup'? a severing, of sorts. a parting of ways. oh well, as gregg dulli once sang, 'you coulda seen this shit coming down the hall'.
and really, being alone is my natural state. i should be alone. i can't relax around other people. it just doesn't work. my wires are crossed....sparks fly from the sockets! a man walks into a....a man sticks a fork into.... snap! the lights go out...he is alone in a room....he is perched on a cliff....he sways down the street, arm in arm with whoever can keep him up...sparks are fleeting....psssst....ladies....it's true....sparks from a toaster....sparks from a man...they glitter and fade...and you are left...with... a...broken....appliance...

i am nearly 40 now. i'm beginning to think the monks life is the way to go. i love the company of a woman, true. but it's just too much of a drag when it's over. and what's it all worth in the end, really? eh, i dunno. smarter men then me have asked the question. i bet descartes had a hard time getting laid too. (that's a joke. go ahead. it's ok to laugh).

regardless. 'i have my books, and my poetry to protect me'.

and my precious music.

g'night, rose throat.